Tuesday, June 10, 2014

The Strange Side Of What If




The Strange Side of What If
By Nomar Knight

Warning! If you’re religious you may find this blog entry to be disturbingly offensive.
As some of you may know, I’m on vacation. Unfortunately, it’s a vacation without a physical destination other than my apartment. L As a result of not having the distraction of work, thoughts begin to interrupt any shot I have at serenity. The thoughts appear in the form of what if scenarios. Here are a few…
What if religion has it wrong?
What if it’s not God, but G.O.D. which stands for Givers of Destiny? Yes, givers as in an entire network of beings working to fulfill your wishes in advance to your trip, um, life experience.
What if for some reason you’re not satisfied with your life; and if you behaved unselfishly, you get a shot at another life? In other words, what if reincarnation is REAL?
What if when you die and don’t believe that Jesus is the son of God? As a result, your after death experience doesn’t include the hippie looking bearded white guy, but a morbid clown on account of all those killer clown movies you watched.
What if you were an atheist and instead of meeting George Carlin in the afterlife, you find yourself stuck in a room with no windows or doors and just a bunch of mirrors surrounding you? Does that mean you have to pray to yourself? Will Joe Pesci save you? And more importantly, how do you get out?
What if Heaven is real but once you’re there to stay, you are faced with interesting choices. One possible choice may be that you may want to spy on your spouse to see how quickly she cheated on you. I’m sorry I meant “look after” loved ones. Perhaps another possible choice would be to haunt your killer and his entire family for generations to come. Nah! Haunting wouldn’t be sanctioned in heaven. Heaven is supposed to be for good people. Animals and innocent children get in automatically. I know this because it is written in the Bible that the hippie guy said that it’s easy for children to get into the kingdom of heaven. He also said rich people are screwed. And the Bible is a trustworthy source, right? As for the animals, I’ve seen pictures of ghosts in the form of pets like cats and dogs. I’ve seen it on the internet so it must be true, right?
What if heaven is a dimension that could be travelled through one of two ways? Way number one which is easy but painful at least at first, is through death. The big finale is guaranteed to us all and many of us are afraid that we’re running out of time. The second way is through time itself. In other words, what if we can travel through a portal that will take us to heaven? The concept sounds ludicrous upon further thought since the realm of heaven is preserved for souls not bodies. How do I know that? Let’s just say I have a hunch.
What if religion is man’s way of hiding the existence of aliens from another galaxy? What if Darwin was right and we are all descendants of apes until an alien inserted his DNA and we evolved into power hungry monsters who want more than just bananas?
What if society’s game of politics is rigged so only the chosen one percent can win? And what is it that they win?
Now, you see why I don’t like having too much time on my hands. Next year I must plan a trip. Perhaps I shall go to Transylvania. Maybe I’ll run into my character, The Countess Lorraina Sandoval. She is a most ruthless vampire.
Ooh, what if vampires weren’t real?


Catch you on the dark side.



Nomar Knight


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